Hollywood Homicide

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Hollywood Homicide
Review (5/10)
(By Brendan Cullin)

In Hollywood Homicide we are treated to a newer, funnier version of Harrison Ford. We get to watch Harrison Ford having fun. We get to watch Harrison Ford laughing for a change. We get to watch Harrison Ford with a cellphone. We get to watch Harrison Ford having kinky sex. We get to watch Harrison Ford humping a one-way mirror in a police interrogation room. The question is, is this new and improved Harrison Ford worth the price of admission?

Ford is paired with Josh Hartnett to form Hollywood's newest buddy-cop thriller. The pair sets out to solve the murder of a rap quartet called H20 Click at a Hollywood night club. They juggle the investigation with their personal part-time jobs - Ford is a real estate salesman who bangs a psychic (Lolita Davidovich) and Hartnett is a yoga instructor who bangs plenty of hot young pieces of ass. The side stories are supposed to provide the comic relief for this light-hearted flick and for the most part they are amusing (although the ringing cellphone joke got a bit out of hand after about the 100th time the phone rang). The problem I had with this movie is the fact that the side stories were much stronger than the main story in the movie, the actual murder investigation. The murder story was weak, poorly written, poorly acted and poorly explained. I found it even a bit confusing at times and by the end of the movie could have cared less if they even caught the criminals. In fact, I found myself more concerned with Ford finally selling the house and Hartnett banging as many hot chicks as possible than I did with the murdered rappers. And to top it all off, there was a twist involving dirty cops that was even more brutally explained. I am still trying to figure out the ridiculous investigation of Ford's detective character because he associates with a psychic and he apparently spends more money than he makes.

I have read and heard a lot about how Harrison Ford and Josh Hartnett did not see eye to eye during the filming of this movie. In fact, I saw Hartnett on Jay Leno the other night saying Harrison gave him a hard time on the set. He was going to talk about it in more detail after a commercial break but I fell asleep so who knows what he said. Who knows if it is even true. One article I read had Hartnett himself describing the filming of Hollywood Homicide as a "tumultuous working experience". I thought the chemistry between the two leads was okay, nothing fabulous. There were times during the movie where Harrison Ford looked more like Clint Eastwood (have you ever noticed how old he looks when he is running) than Indiana Jones would running through the street.

Overall, I have to say Hollywood Homicide was a mild disappointment. Yes, at times it was funny. Actually, it would be more accurate to describe it as mildly amusing. Yes, some of the action was roller-coaster-like. But once the credits started rolling, I was left with an empty feeling. Didn't feel happy, didn't feel sad, didn't feel horny. Just felt like the movie was over and I forgot almost the entire experience five minutes later. Well, except for the frightful experience of seeing Lou Diamond Phillips in drag. I wouldn't recommend running out to the theatre to see this one. Especially if you run like Harrison Ford. It might take you a few days to get there.

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