Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star

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Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star
Review (4.5/10)
(By Brendan Cullin)

Dickie Roberts is the story of the former child star, played by David Spade, who is trying to revive his career by getting a leading role in an upcoming Rob Reiner film. Reiner feels that Dickie is perfect for the part except for the fact that because he never had a real childhood, he knows nothing about real life. To help prepare him for the audition of this upcoming role, Dickie hires a family to help him relive the childhood that he never experienced. The family features a couple of cute kids, a very hot mother (played by Mary McCormack) and a jackass father. Oh, and of course, Spade gets the piece of ass bitch of a girlfriend, played by Alyssa Milano, who we get to see prance around the screen almost half-naked - but hey, I'm not complaining!

Dickie Roberts was famous as a child star for coining the phrase nuckin' futs. The film lost me at nuckin' futs. Nuckin' futs is not nuckin' funny. I don't care that the premise of the movie is ridiculous. I do care that the laughs in the movie are few and far between. Nevertheless, Dickie Roberts did have its moments. Watching Dickie in a celebrity boxing match with Emmanuel Lewis was funny. Seeing how much weight Emmanuel has gained was disturbing. There were a few other scenes throughout the movie where I chuckled. Chuckled, but didn't laugh. The child star sing-a-long at the end of the movie was good. It featured a bunch of former child stars, including the possible future governor of California Gary Coleman, Todd Bridges, Joanie from Happy Days, some people from What's Happening?, some of the former child stars from The Brady Bunch and The Patridge Family and a few others - Adam Rich, Corey Haim (both of whom are frighteningly unrecognizable) and Corey Feldman. That musical montage is hilarious and is almost in and of itself worth the price of admission. It's just too bad that there weren't some more child stars featured in it - some that a bit younger crowd could recognize. The only problem is that some of these child stars from the 80's probably don't consider themselves washed up child stars, even though in all reality they are washed up. Having child stars scattered throughout the movie might have made this flick more interesting too. There are a few cameos, but not nearly enough to save this film. I found myself most intrigued when some of the "real" child stars appeared on the screen. They were much more interesting than David Spade.

Dickie Roberts is basically another one of those Happy Madison productions that features one of the old Saturday Night Live crew (it's usually either Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider or David Spade). When you walk out of the movie, you may have had a few laughs, but in the end you feel like you have just seen a movie that Sandler was able to finance from his $20 million salaries that simply was made to keep some of his old friends working. If you've seen any of Rob Schneider's last two or three films or any of Adam Sandler's films before Punch-Drunk Love, I can assure you that you are getting more or less the same jokes and the same basic story in Dickie Roberts - the sappy ending, a few fart and penis jokes, plenty of insults being hurled at people, and a lot of your basic slapstick humour. There are no suprises here and probably even a few less laughs. Spade's rather dry sense of humour and obnoxious insults usually work, and in parts of the movie they sometimes do, but overall, he just adds to the lame ass jokes that pop up throughout the entire movie. It is strange how funny these guys (I'll exclude Sandler here because I still think he is pretty funny) were on SNL and how lame they have become on the big screen. The sad thing is that, in a career that has included Black Sheep, Lost and Found and Joe Dirt, Dickie Roberts may be Spade's best work to date. I suppose there will always be people who find the dick and fart jokes and all the rest of that recycled crap funny. But if Spade is not careful, he may find his career taking the same path of another SNL alumni - Dana Carvey, whose last movie, The Master of Disguise, is one of the worst movies ever. The only thing I can suggest is to stay for the end credits and enjoy the real child stars sing-a-long.

Keyword : Rob Reiner, Eli, Adam Sandler, Rio, Mary McCormack, Alyssa Milano, Musical, Music, Corey Feldman, You, David, Ate, Basic, Black, Black Sheep, EMI, Ex, Good, Here, I Do, Lio, Love, May, Naked, Out, Oz, Punch, Red, Run, RV, Screen, Stay, Up, Will, FILM, Bi, Now, M., Ady, Eren, Tere

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