Blade Trinity

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Blade Trinity
Review (5.5/10)
(By Brendan Cullin)

Blade: Trinity is the third installment of the Blade franchise, which stars Wesley Snipes as a genetically altered vampire who hunts down and kills the "bad" vampies who seek human blood from living human bodies. In this chapter of the comic book hero's life, we find him being pursued by perhaps the greatest vampire of them all - Dracula (Dominic Purcell). You see, Dracula (also know as Drake) has been awakened from a deep sleep by a band of bad-ass vampires who are lead by a not-so-seemingly bad vampiress named Danica (Parker Posey) and also highlighted by her trusty muscle-bound sidekick played by WWE wrestler Triple H. With Dracula on their side, the vampires set out to destroy Blade, who is also being pursued by the police and the FBI. They see him as no more than a psychotic mass murderer. With half the city on his tail, Blade is forced to go into hiding and eventually recruits the help of two other vampire hunters, Hannibal King (Ryan Reynolds) and Abigail Whistler (Jessica Biel). The three vampire hunters and a small band of other humans set out to hunt down and destroy Dracula and all the other bloodsuckers before they kill Blade and take over the world. Also making a brief appearance is Blade's right-hand man and father-figure Abraham Whistler, played by Kris Kristofferson.

After enjoying the first two Blade movies (yes, even the much-criticized second movie), I must conclude that "Trinity" is my least favourite of the three. Does the movie have some entertaining moments? Yeah, here and there, it does. As expected, some of the fight scenes are quite good. There are a number of new an improved weapons that are introduced that are cool (albeit never used as much as one would hope). I liked the introduction of the Dracula character (although, at one point, he looked mysteriously similar to Predator) and Dominic Purcell did bring a menacing quality to the character. But like the weapons, I found the character to be severely under-utilized. He just seemed like he was never a huge threat to Blade and the rest of the hunters. Perhaps if he was given the green light to knock off one of the movie's main characters, he could have been more appreciated.

But alas, the character just seems to fall short. As does pretty much the entire movie. Most of the acting in the movie is average to below average, with perhaps the exception of Kristofferson. (Not that I was expecting much from Triple H.) The dialogue in the movie was just horrendous. Blade just seems to mumble his way through a number of lines, yet he never really has anything important to say. And don't even get me started on Ryan Reynolds (Canada's own version of Jason Lee). I think this guy's sole purpose in the movie was to deliver one after another one-liners. Yet, not one of them was funny. Not even one. It got to the point where I just wanted him to shut the fuck up and die. But I will give him credit for one thing - he got in amazing shape for this movie. The guy was just ripped. But so not funny. In fact, the only part in the entire movie where I laughed was a scene involving a Dracula dildo. Good stuff.

Nevertheless, Blade: Trinity, although not a complete write-off, is far and away the worst of the series, so far. Perhaps its loud music, choppy action scenes and bad dialogue will appeal to the younger generateion but not to this hombre. The movie does have a few redeeming qualities (I did enjoy some of the action, some of the weapons and all of Jessica Biel) but in the end, it's just not the bad ass movie I was expecting and that was a disappointment.

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